Dr. Lawrence Patihis: Do You Really Remember It That Way? The Science of False Memories, Estrangement & Emotional Truth
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What if your most painful memory never happened the way you think it did? In this episode, Joseph and Richard sit down with renowned psychological researcher Dr. Lawrence Patihis to explore the surprisingly malleable nature of human memory. From emotionally charged estrangement stories to suppressed childhood trauma and courtroom testimony, this conversation unpacks the fine line between memory, emotion, and truth.
Dr. Patihis—best known for his work on repressed memories, memory distortion, and the fallibility of eyewitness accounts—brings hard science to a topic often dominated by subjective narrative. What emerges is a timely reminder: not all memories are accurate, and not all healing requires reliving the past.
This episode is essential listening for therapists, coaches, healers, or anyone navigating complicated personal or familial dynamics.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
Memory is reconstructive, not reproductive—meaning we assemble memories in the moment, often influenced by emotions and beliefs.
Emotionally charged therapy settings can increase the risk of suggestibility, especially when clients are encouraged to “uncover” forgotten trauma.
False memories can feel just as real—and just as painful—as true ones. Emotional intensity does not equal accuracy.
Estrangement narratives are often built on distorted recollections; some reconciliations occur when people question the truth of their own memory.
Patihis’ research shows a surprising number of people recall impossible events (like meeting Bugs Bunny at Disneyland) when primed—illustrating how malleable our memories are.
Therapists and coaches should be cautious about leading questions, regression techniques, or suggestive practices that could implant false memories.
The concept of “emotional truth” has risen in popularity, but conflating it with factual accuracy can harm relationships and legal processes.
Not every painful emotion requires excavating the past—sometimes healing begins with present-moment awareness and relational repair.
learn more
Dr. Lawrence Patihis ResearchGate Profile
Loftus & Pickrell’s “Lost in the Mall” Study (1995) (foundational study on false memory implantation)
The Memory Illusion by Dr. Julia Shaw
American Psychological Association: Guidelines on Memory and Trauma
Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me) by Carol Tavris & Elliot Aronson